Happy Fuckin' Holidays, assholes
Continuing my tradition of getting joy by seeing what search strings bring people to Switzerblog, I bring you today's immigrant hatin', Christmas lovin', ass-kissin' world traveler edition.
Unsurprisingly, a lot of folks are searching for the war on Christmas, menorrah vs. tree smackdown at Sea-Tac, and the longest thread ever (see below) is coming up in those searches. Today's big winner, though, is whatever genius searched the following phrase (reproduced exactly as written):
But I know, all hail the Republican conception of Christmas! Here's the thing: I was an early adopter of Happy Holidays rather than Merry Christmas, way back in the '80's - I made the personal change not because I wanted to destroy Christmas or anything deeply, deeply stupid like that (and yes, your idea that anyone's trying to destroy Christmas is deeply, deeply stupid), but because it was a simpler solution to the Merry Christmas and Happy New Year greeting, and eliminated the occasional misapplication of a Christmas greeting to a Jew or Jehovah's Witness. It boiled down to accepting the reality that there is more than one holiday, and being more polite to more people. Seems pretty simple, but as always, Republicans have decided it has to be a war. Twats.
Anyhoo, on to your second point, re: immigrants kissing your ass in their country. My question is, have you been kissing immigrant's asses? That seems unsanitary. Seriously, the complaint you're making only underscores one of the reasons people come here, and why I suspect you're a militant flag-waving America worshipper yourself - we respect a diversity of beliefs here, and always have done so. We respect your right to be a closed-minded jackass, and my right to be a smart-mouthed asshole. Not every country is so welcoming, but Ellis Island didn't exist because we wanted immigrants to come here and conform, but because we welcomed them with open arms as they were. So no, you probably wouldn't have much luck getting the Jerusalem airport to install Christmas trees or remove menorrahs (assuming they even decorate), but that's just one more reason to remind people you're from the best goddamn country in the world.
And with that, I wish you a happy fuckin' holiday, asshole.
Unsurprisingly, a lot of folks are searching for the war on Christmas, menorrah vs. tree smackdown at Sea-Tac, and the longest thread ever (see below) is coming up in those searches. Today's big winner, though, is whatever genius searched the following phrase (reproduced exactly as written):
i can't say merry christmas, cause it will offend immigrants, but if i go to their country, they won't kiss my ass and cater to meAllow me to help you out, genius. You see, you can say Merry Christmas - people do it all the time. The claim that saying this phrase offends immigrants is coming not from immigrants, but from the right wing mouthpieces and Fox News retards you depend on for your news. Immigrants, for the most part, also celebrate Christmas. Furthermore, the only places people have tried to rethink this phrase officially is in the retail/service sector - why? Because there are many people celebrating lots of different holidays at this time of year, and it's polite to include them. If you're a free-market guy, IT'S ALSO GOOD BUSINESS TO EMBRACE AS MANY DIFFERENT PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE. Kwanzaa, Chanukah, New Years, Christmas, Thanksgiving, hell, Boxing Day! All these are holidays being celebrated around this time of year, and it seems reasonable for folks to exchange a greeting wishing folks happiness while celebrating all of them.
But I know, all hail the Republican conception of Christmas! Here's the thing: I was an early adopter of Happy Holidays rather than Merry Christmas, way back in the '80's - I made the personal change not because I wanted to destroy Christmas or anything deeply, deeply stupid like that (and yes, your idea that anyone's trying to destroy Christmas is deeply, deeply stupid), but because it was a simpler solution to the Merry Christmas and Happy New Year greeting, and eliminated the occasional misapplication of a Christmas greeting to a Jew or Jehovah's Witness. It boiled down to accepting the reality that there is more than one holiday, and being more polite to more people. Seems pretty simple, but as always, Republicans have decided it has to be a war. Twats.
Anyhoo, on to your second point, re: immigrants kissing your ass in their country. My question is, have you been kissing immigrant's asses? That seems unsanitary. Seriously, the complaint you're making only underscores one of the reasons people come here, and why I suspect you're a militant flag-waving America worshipper yourself - we respect a diversity of beliefs here, and always have done so. We respect your right to be a closed-minded jackass, and my right to be a smart-mouthed asshole. Not every country is so welcoming, but Ellis Island didn't exist because we wanted immigrants to come here and conform, but because we welcomed them with open arms as they were. So no, you probably wouldn't have much luck getting the Jerusalem airport to install Christmas trees or remove menorrahs (assuming they even decorate), but that's just one more reason to remind people you're from the best goddamn country in the world.
And with that, I wish you a happy fuckin' holiday, asshole.
Labels: Religious nonsense
posted by switzerblog at
3:25 PM
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